So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
