toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
