I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Randomize
