PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
