I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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