Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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