no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
