dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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