who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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