CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
