I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
