Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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