Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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