So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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