she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
