The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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