Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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