garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Sacagawea was the original milf.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
