Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
You can't special order awesome
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
