A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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