i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize