I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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