careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
