I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
