i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
