after a month anything with tits is on the radar
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I had to cum in my sink.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
