The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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