So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
