jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Everything about him screamed your future.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
