i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
