dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
she peed on how many people?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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