this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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