It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
