Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Randomize
