that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
farters have to be the big spoon...
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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