My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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