i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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