Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
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