Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
