It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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