she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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