There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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