Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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