I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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