There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
