They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
