Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
