why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
