I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
