I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Ketchup is God's man juice
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
